There was a time I told myself I was going to be more positive.
You know that moment you’ve had a rough day, your brain is running wild, and you’re like, “Right. That’s it. From tomorrow… only positive thoughts.”
And then your inner voice goes…
“Yeah, okay mate.”
That was me.
Because the truth is, trying to jump from 80–90% negative thinking straight to 100% positive?
It doesn’t feel real. It doesn’t feel safe. And most importantly, your brain doesn’t believe you.
So, it pushes back.
Hard.
Why Your Brain Defaults to Negative
Here’s something that helped me stop fighting my own mind:
Your brain isn’t broken; it’s doing its job.
Back in the day, we had to remember what could kill us.
Which berries were poisonous.
Which places were dangerous.
Focusing on the negative kept us alive.
Focusing on the positive?
Nice, but not essential for survival.
So now, even though you’re not going to die from making a mistake at work or saying the wrong thing in a conversation, your brain still reacts like you might.
That spiral you feel?
That tight chest, overthinking, worst-case scenarios?
That’s just your brain trying to protect you.
So instead of 100% Positive, try 50/50.
This is where the shift happens.
Instead of forcing yourself to be positive all the time, try this:
Every time you think something negative, think something positive as well.
Not instead of.
Alongside.
So if your brain says:
“I stuffed that job up.”
You respond with:
“Yeah… and I also handled that last task really well.”
Or:
“I always mess things up.”
You bring in:
“I’ve actually improved a lot compared to last month.”
It’s not fake positivity.
It’s balance.
And your brain is far more likely to accept that.
When You’re Already Spiralling
Now let’s be real: sometimes you’re already deep in it.
You’re not calmly thinking,
“Oh yes, let me add a positive thought here.”
You’re in a full spiral.
That’s where you need a circuit breaker.
Something that pulls you out of your head and back into the present moment.
My Go-To Circuit Breaker (That Actually Works)
Drinking water.
Sounds simple. It is. But it works.
Here’s why:
- It gives your brain something physical to focus on (the sensation, the temperature)
- Your brain registers: “We’re safe enough to stop and drink
- That helps calm your fight-or-flight-or-freeze response.
It’s like a little reset button.
Other Circuit Breakers You Can Use
If water’s not your thing in the moment, try:
- 5 senses check-in. Name:
-
- 5 things you can see
- 4 things you can feel
- 3 things you can hear
- 2 things you can smell
- 1 thing you can taste
- Strong scents (like essential oils). Not about healing — just something strong enough to pull your focus.
- Feet on the ground. Literally. Shoes off. Ground yourself.
These aren’t about fixing everything.
They’re about stopping the spiral long enough for you to regain control.
The game changer: Run the Thought to the End
This one changed a lot for me.
Because most of the time, our brain doesn’t think things through; it just jumps to:
“This is bad → everything is ruined → life is over.”
But what happens?
Let’s say:
“If I make a mistake, I’ll lose my job.”
Okay… let’s slow that down.
Step by step:
- You make a mistake
- You tell your supervisor
- They look at it
- They either fix it or guide you to fix it
- Maybe they’re a bit annoyed
- Then, you move on
That’s it.
Not:
“I’ll be homeless, and no one will ever respect me again.”
Your brain skips steps.
You bring it back.
Why This Matters More Than You Think
When you:
- Balance your thoughts (instead of forcing positivity)
- Interrupt spirals (instead of staying stuck in them)
- Think things through logically
You create space.
Space to think clearly.
Space to act better.
Space to enjoy your work and your life.
A Small Shift That Changes Everything
You don’t need to become a completely positive person overnight.
You don’t need to “fix” your brain.
You just need to start here:
- One negative thought
- One positive thought
That’s it.
Do that enough times, and you’ll notice something:
Your brain starts doing it automatically.
Final Thought
You don’t have to silence the negative voice.
You just must stop letting it be the only one talking.
Because when you give equal space to what’s going right,
You don’t just feel better
You think clearer, act stronger, and show up as someone who’s in control, not just reacting.
And that…changes everything.
If you’re a tradeswoman or tradesperson who’d like some help navigating this journey, I’d love to chat. You can book a coaching consultation with me here:
https://calendly.com/louise-azzopardi/coaching_consult
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