When the Toughest Person You Work with Is… You
Let’s talk about one of the biggest contributors to anxiety: the voice in our own head.
That quiet whisper (or sometimes yelling), saying:
- “Don’t mess this up.”
- “Everyone’s watching.”
- “You should’ve known better.”
- “Why can’t you get it right?”
We speak to ourselves in ways we would never speak to a friend.
We’ll comfort others when they make a mistake…
but tear ourselves apart when we do.
And that constant pressure?
That can drain every bit of confidence you’ve worked so hard to build.
The Sump Story I’ll Never Forget
Once, I was working overtime a simple job:
Put the sump back on a bus, tighten the bolts, paperwork, clock out. Easy.
Except… it wasn’t.
I lifted the sump into place, tightened everything up, and then
CRACK.
I took it down.
Staring right back at me, in giant letters:
FRONT.
Which… surprise! I hadn’t checked.
I told my supervisor we parked it ‘til morning.
Next day, we found out there were no sump rails of that type in Australia.
They had to import one.
The bus sat waiting.
And so did my guilt.
And for weeks after, I kept replaying it in my mind:
Why did I rush? Why didn’t I look? They’ll never trust me again. I mess up everything.
I wasn’t just carrying a mistake
I was carrying the weight of every mistake I’d ever made.
That’s what anxiety does.
It rewinds. It replays. It traps us in the worst scenes of our own story.
How Our Brain Turns One Bad Thought into a Habit
Here’s the science-but-cool bit:
Our brain is basically a squishy electrical circuit.
Thoughts move like electricity, and electricity always travels the easiest path.
So, if the easiest path is:
“I’m not good enough”
“I always fail”
“Everyone is judging me”
Guess where the brain goes every time?
That path becomes wide, fast, familiar.
A mental super-highway.
But positive thoughts?
Those are like trying to hack through bushes with a blunt machete.
New. Uncomfortable. Easy to abandon.
Not because positive thinking doesn’t work, but because the negative pathway has had more practice.
And that?
Is something we can change.
Two Tools to Break the Cycle
1. Circuit Breakers
When the spiral starts, interrupt it.
Like flipping the breaker before the whole system blows.
This can look like:
- Drinking cold water mindfully
- Stepping away for a five-minute reset
- Writing down the negative thoughts, then tearing them up and binning them
It doesn’t solve everything.
But it gives your brain space to breathe again.
2. Build a Better Highway: Repeat the Good Stuff
We need to give our brain new paths to choose from.
Try
A daily gratitude practice
Writing down small wins every day
Celebrating everything you’re learning and achieving
Because in trades:
Wins are everywhere; we just don’t acknowledge them.
- Your first service
- Your first oil filter change
- The first time you didn’t panic when asked a question
- The day you asked for help instead of suffering quietly
- Showing up when anxiety tried to keep you home
Each one deserves recognition.
That’s how confidence grows: repetition of the truth:
You are learning.
You are capable.
You are allowed to make mistakes.
You are enough.
You Deserve a Kinder Inner Voice
Your self-talk can either:
- rebuild you, or
- break you down into tiny pieces
You are with yourself 24/7.
You don’t need to be your own bully.
The world can be tough enough.
Let your mind be your teammate, not your enemy.
Reflection Prompt
Where can you choose a gentler thought about yourself today?
Write it down. Say it out loud. Practice believing it.
Thank You for Being Here
This was Part 1 of our three-part series on Managing Anxiety.
Next up, we’ll dive into the tools that help us deal with pressure on and off the tools.
And remember:
Bravery isn’t the absence of anxiety.
It’s choosing to keep going anyway.
I’ll talk to you in the next blog.
Keep showing up imperfect, learning, and full of heart.
If you’re a tradeswoman or tradesperson who’d like some help navigating this journey, I’d love to chat. You can book a coaching consultation with me here:
https://calendly.com/louise-azzopardi/coaching_consult
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